If you are a recovering perfectionist like me, I highly recommend “Love Idol” by Jennifer Dukes. It was an easy read. It grabbed my attention in the first few paragraphs. Not just because I am a recovering perfectionist, but I am a woman. A woman who seeks to serve God with all my heart, mind and body and yet feels like I miss the boat all too often.
“Love Idol” was a fresh perspective. I have never thought of how my drive to seek approval, perform (do for others), maintain order etc… as idols. Yet Jennifer Dukes’ analogies were dead on. Not only that, but she very openly discusses the impact these “love idols” can have on our families, especially our daughters. It’s not just the perfectionist tendencies, ALL of us have “love idols”. For some it may be more about holding one’s self out as the nurturer, playful woman who puts others above tasks, chores, performance. It can often even be our service or ministries.
An idol is anything that captures our hearts, our minds. We begin to think more of those things than we do God. As we focus, our efforts become more about our ways, our plans, our thoughts than His. I know, stings a little doesn’t it!?!
I recommend this book. In fact, mine is on loan right now to a young mom. It is an easy read, but a thought provoking read. You could get through it in a day or two, but I recommend taking it chapter by chapter and pondering.
My take aways:
1. God continues to use writings, friends, music to remind me of the need to slow down, step back. I absolutely will not find God in the hurried days of a cram packed life.
2. I am uniquely gifted and created. He has a purpose for me, one He will allow me to fulfill if I watch and wait. Life is full of seasons, and in due season my gifts and talents will be used in various ways and in differing amounts.
3. There is no doubt our families come before our service, our ministries and our work.
4. The comparison game is dangerous and deadly. Too often, I am comparing myself to my own too high standards, not so much to others. I need to release those self-imposed standards.
If you are interested in the book or learning more about Jennifer Dukes go here: